An apparition in the haze

An apparition in the haze

The landscape used to be entirely drowned in the haze

but lately the mist has been thinning, day after day

and two ghostly faces have appeared in front of me

Are these faces real, or only a mirage as I fear

are they a game of my imagination

a wishful dream

or the reality that is growing into the world

Can I pass through these faces as clouds of fog

or are they solid and tangible

Day after day these questions trouble my mind

as the two faces become more and more clear

until when I am forced to recognize

that even though it doesn’t make sense at all

these faces are real

and even though I can pass through them

they somehow exist

and together they express a truth, a dream

I couldn’t hope to believe in

And this apparition has thrown my old beliefs in shambles

as I realize the solid ground I had built them on

is decomposing underneath their foundations

and the pillars I had thought unbreakable

and overwhelming with their rational mass

are shattering one after another

as if they were made of glass or sand

For long I didn’t dare to believe in this miracle

that was metamorphosing my life

and sang of true love and undeserved happiness

but now as the temple of my old beliefs fall

and the cathedral of my dreams rise into the sky

not built in stones but grown from the land

grown into my very flesh

and producing an unearthly music

singing of things that cannot exist in this world

but promising that one day they shall become true

Believe, my dear, believe in your dreams

and everything around you shall one day transform

and all your visions shall become true

Until a few weeks ago when I heard these words

I thought I was mad, but now that the old world is decomposing

as we speak and sing and write

I realize my notion of what is true and what isn’t was incorrect

and that all the depressing beliefs that prevented me

to think happiness and love are real

are turning into dust

and all what remains in front of me are two faces

that grow clearer and brighter every day that passes

two faces grown in dream clouds

that look eerily alike

two faces that don’t look at one another

but gaze at exactly the same thing in exactly the same way

are those two or one persons

what is this invisible bond that seems to unite both their hearts

in a material that proves more solid than pillars of stone

and how can I at the same time be myself and one of these faces

that resembles that of a god more than a man

is it possible that so much beauty and so much love

hides within my skin and my bone

only asking to express themselves as I strip my body

of its clothes and its masks

and my naked skin starts radiating light as a glowing moon

So the whole key to be happy

was to let go of all the necklaces and the clothes I wore

to keep my body warm and cosy

for now I feel warm in my nakedness even below freezing temperatures

Do you feel the same as I do my dear

are you too obsessed with these two figures you see

growing in the sky before you every day

and these words I write, the visions I sing about

can you too see them with your eyes, sing of them in your own colours

are you too longing so deeply for the same things

and not believing how beautiful the world truly is

are you too feeling more comfortable in your own skin

than in all the clothes you could wear before

if you do, we are then ready to take the last step

to jump once again in emptiness

and become these two faces we see close to one another every day

it is only an old belief that is preventing us from being fully them

a belief that has already started crumbling

like a pillar turning into sand in slow motion

and once the top of the pillar decomposes

the roof of the temple of false beliefs shall fall

and what used to be a huge ominous mass

will be again a flat land in need of rain and creation seeds

that within a few seasons shall transform

in the most beautiful garden and orchard

we’ve both ever seen

and this place shall be ours to walk in

hand in hand, admiring the beauty of all those unknown trees

tasting their fruits and one another’s body

and within our deeper essence finding the seeds

for other billions of world to create together

as both our hands weave words replying to one another

complementing one another like the voice of two musical instruments

and our two other hands draw and paint our way toward these worlds

within infinite canvas that surrounds us

 

 

About Erik Vincenti Zakhia

Dear all, I will share with you many of my poems, short stories, drawings and paintings telling of my journey of self-discovery and my reflections about life, love, art, spirituality, sexuality, kundalini rise, and twin flames. They all fall within the realm of Hazen. May you have an inspiring visit!

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