Finding sleep

How will find the peace to sleep tonight

Must I masturbate to squander my tension away

Or should I accept this wave of energy and ride it instead?

Why can’t inspiration be quiet and steady

Why should I be apathetic in the morning and seething and steaming with thought at night?

Or perhaps should I accept my restlessness and understand where it stems from

In a way my creativity is still contained, bottling up and exploding at night

I must find a way to express it more and more during the day

And I must learn to ride it and fully use all its powerful energy

Transforming it into light

Carving from it cities and worlds of stone as fine as lace

Transparent as crystal

For now my creativity is more like a black hole sucking away the light

It’s like an exploding ball of energy that has not yet expanded and cooled

I can’t complain though, inspiration is finally here in force

When I’ve waited for it for many many months, deprived of my very essence

Going about my daily tasks as a lifeless ghost

No, that time is over now

I’ve crossed a desert, and now everything around me is taking life again

May the morrow bring the clearness I still lack of

May my steps become firmer and steadier toward the beacon of light that has lit my path all along

May all the worlds dwelling within me fill with light